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Sunday, October 21, 2012

What I think about making porn.

 I'VE HAD ENOUGH.

After a whole week of having every newspaper providing extensive daily coverage on "porn stars" Alvin Tan and Vivian Lee, which never fails to infuriate me over my morning toasted oats, I've decided it's time for me to speak out.

Note: The following post is purely my own personal opinion, unless when quoting news articles as cited. 


Let me give you some background details, if you live under a rock and have not picked up a newspaper in the past 7 days. The "porn stars" are a couple that met through Facebook, and had been uploading nude pics and sex videos on Facebook itself until continuous flagging led to their content being removed. Unperturbed, they set up a blog to continue uploading their sexploits.

More background info: Alvin is a 24 year old ASEAN scholar studying in NUS, and is in his final year to complete his law degree. Vivian is 23, and recently graduated her business degree from Universiti Malaya. As far as I can tell, both are mentally sane, and are consenting adults.

These two people clearly crave attention, and would do anything to get more and more of it, with complete disregard for any morals, decency, or self-worth. They've even spoken out against their critics, telling us to back off, and claimed they were unapologetic, and would still continue uploading their pictures and videos in the future.


It truly baffles me about how short-sighted some people can be. We hear so many cases regarding angry males using an ex-girlfriend's naked photos or sex videos to threaten the poor unsuspecting girl for money or sex. The girl is always fearful for her reputation, and always regrets having taken those pictures or videos in the first place, unless of course they were taken against her will.

However, in this case, it was reportedly Vivian who initiated the risqué activities in the first place. She has no regrets in making her sex life an open book, but I say that she will come to regret her actions very soon. Sex videos may always work in the favour of our glamorous Hollywood stars, but sad to say the world regards non-starlets who attempt such feats in a much different light.

After all, she's already been given an ultimatum to either move out of the family home or marry Alvin; and since she has stated she will not marry Alvin as they are not monogamous (shall refrain from slanderous comments, but I wonder if she has other porn blogs with other boyfriends), I suppose she has decided to choose taking naked pictures over the person that gave birth to her. Although I am certain that a mother's love lasts forever, I do question the rationale behind leaving her family to move in with her six-month casual boyfriend.


And then of course, there is the sexist factor.

We've all questioned why when a guy brags about his conquests, he's hailed as a hero; but if a girl does the same, she is immediately labelled a slut. Yes, gender bias is not fair; but neither are genetic diseases or poverty, and the big unfair world will not change overnight.

As a business graduate, Vivian will face much difficulty in securing any form of permanent employment, because noone wants the "slut" to poison their company's image. I also question the ability of their relationship to endure all the negativity directed their way if they resolutely continue along this path; and if they break up, Vivian will be left both homeless and penniless. I hope that your 15 minutes of fame was worth it dearie, because they are fast running out.

While Alvin should not be spared as he also suffers from the same lack of morals as his casual girlfriend, I hate to admit that his future has not been completely tarnished. Even if he gets expelled from NUS for inappropriate conduct, he is still very bright, rich enough to support himself and Vivian, and regrettably males will not be ostracised for making their sex life public.


This couple has thrown all moral codes, family values, and the Asian conservative culture out the window, which is a steep price to pay for all the infamy they've gained. Be careful what you wish for when you claim you want "Alvin and Vivian to be a household name as an openly sexual duo".

My advice is to pull up your pants, turn off your camera; and have a serious conversation about where this road will take you in 1 month, 6 months, 1 year, 5 years. Because when the world turns its attention towards the next big scandal and you become fish and chip paper (or to be more Malaysian-appropriate, pet poop paper), and the world as you know it crumble down around your ears, you will have noone to blame but your attention-seeking selves.


The story on the couple alone would already have made every hair on my body stand on end, but there was one particular issue that the newspaper repeatedly chose to highlight which greatly annoyed me, that is the generational gap between the "parent" generation that is outraged over the whole incident, and the "pro choice" youth that are completely blasé and accepting of the couple's personal decision to run a sex blog.

I am a youth of today, and I have chosen to lambast their actions. As a Christian, I also have a personal stance against pre-marital sex, but I will not impose my personal beliefs on others; abstinence is an uphill battle in today's sex-charged world, and it is my cross that I choose to carry.

However, I (try to) keep an open mind with others who do not share my beliefs. I am accepting of others choosing to get laid. I am even accepting of those that take pornographic pictures and videos of themselves for personal titillation, even if I think they are playing with fire.

But I cannot and refuse to accept a couple that takes pornographic material and then chooses to distribute it; to intentionally invite the whole world into their bedroom, all simply in the name of fun. And if they are willingly alienating themselves from their families in pursuit of such illicit fun, it adds more to my distaste. It is not as if they are leaving abusive families, or typical old-fashioned families that who refuse to allow them to be anything but doctors, but they are crossing their frustrated parents who are obviously now doubting their capability to educate their own children.

Most of my friends also readily agree that what Alvin and Vivian did was not by any means "ok". And to be fair, this pool of friends also include those that admit to regularly watching porn. Perhaps the youth of today may be more accepting of couples being sexual, but we do draw the line at being completely open about it, be it by reason of family values, Asian roots, or good ol' common sense.

The youth of today are not stupid, you know.

Religion and morals have admittedly have taken a backseat to the "I want, I get" mentality of the fast food generation, but we are nothing if not arrogant bastards. We hold our reputation near and dear, because we know its value in a world that keeps getting smaller and smaller. Most of us will never, ever choose to smugly distribute pornographic material that feature ourselves to the world at large, because we are too smart to do so.

They are called private parts for a reason, you know. And I think this couple should start keeping their private affairs to themselves.


*breathe in, breathe out.

I apologise for being so uncharacteristically scathing. It has been awhile since something has angered me this much. But these thoughts have been zipping about in my head every single time I read about the couple in the newspaper, so I decided to have a good long rant about it.

If anything, hats off to Alvin and Vivian for never wavering in their enthusiasm for carrying out their activities in the face of harsh criticism, but only if they aren't simply too proud to face a tirade of "I told you so"s. I do hope for an eventual change of heart for them though, hopefully before any more damage is done. A public apology made within the next few days may well be their only shot at salvaging the remains of their tattered reputations.

But of course whether that happens or not, the spotlight on them is still fast fading. Good luck to you both (you'll need it), and good riddance to the unwelcome extensive coverage.

8 comments:

  1. I think the problem is not with them, but with the media. Freedom is the most basic of all human rights and they may do whatever they want, so long as they don't harm anybody.

    Not that I encourage the behaviour, but they have the right to do what they want.

    The point, is why do the media (and to an extent, us) care so much?

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  2. There is no such thing as freedom, because there are always, always limits. Sad, but true.

    How would you feel about this freedom if a girl had sex with a dog? Or goat? And posted everything online? Technically, what she's doing isn't harming anyone at all.

    The whole Alvin-Vivian issue is highly controversial yet not political, which for the media is unearthing gold. And the thing about controversial issues is that they tend to strike a sensitive chord with the average man: you either support or disapprove of their actions, and it is very hard to stay indifferent.

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  3. Omg super agree with you Julia !! There are rumors that this young couple might be facing imprisonment for 3 years. How ridiculous

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  4. Thanks Pei! There's no news about legal action taken towards them by Malaysian courts yet la, so any rumours of imprisonment are 100% false. Personally, I think they will suffer enough on their own even without going to jail.

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  5. just for more understanding,is it they are being taking a legal action based on their porn blog or the issues of bak kuh teh? i'm kinda lost

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    Replies
    1. This post was written quite some time back. They're currently on bail for 3 charges: the porn blog, the bak kut teh posting, and inciting religious tension. Though I'm not supportive of any of their actions and think they should be somehow punished, I don't think they deserved to be jailed.

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  6. This is interesting! I enjoyed reading your great post.Thanks for the valuable information and insights you have shared here. Babysitters Videos

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're most welcome! Glad you enjoyed reading it. :)

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